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Sunday, October 14, 2012

...THAT Mom...

I was having a conversation with one of my best girlfriends the other week about what it means to be "that" mom.  She was getting ready to voice her first day care "concern" to the director and said that she didn't want to come across as "that" mom.  As a self identified "that" mom, I quickly assured her that being "that" mom was awesome.  It means that you are a caring and advocating parent who will always look out for your child and if it means that you ruffle others feathers, so be it.

But since that conversation, I have really thought about all of the other possible definitions that can define "that" mom.  I have determined that the definition of "that" is infinitely layered and is only dependent upon the situation it is referenced in.  Which brings me to this post.  Who is "that" mom?

According to Mirriam-Webster, 
that (pronoun) is defined as the person, thing, or idea indicated, mentioned or understood from the situation.  
(I swear I did NOT look this up until AFTER I made my own definition!!)

In my world, I have numerous personal definitions...

"that" mom:  The mom who turns into a Mama BEAR at the very thought that someone or something has done something to make one or both of her children unhappy or hurt.

"that" mom:  The mom who intentionally embarrasses her children at the stoplight by singing and dancing wildly while the children in the back seat are pleading "Moooooommmmmm."

"that" mom:  The mom who is coined by the principal, directors, teachers, counselors as the mom who is high-maintenance and will ask too many question, voice too many concerns, and the very sight of her can make them growl under their breath.

"that" mom:  The mom who makes decisions that not all other moms would make and may go against societal norms.  (e.g. the mom who decides that co-sleeping is the best option for MANY reasons and who breast fed her daughter until she was almost 21 months old)

"that" mom:  The mom who gives in at the store so as not to cause a tantrum because you just can't deal with one more crisis that day.

"that" mom:  The mom who carries her children kicking, screaming and biting out of the store because she has not yet met her quota of tantrums for the day, leaving an entire cart of things for an employee to put back.

"that" mom:  The mom who sits in her car and cries after dropping her child off in a crying panic because they don't want to go to school that day.  

"that" mom:  The mom who loses her temper and says things she doesn't mean out of rage, and then cries because she can't believe she would ever say something like she did.

"that" mom:  The mom who will go without something that she wants so that her kids can have something that they want.

"that" mom:  The mom who sits in the bathtub with her vomiting children in the middle of the night because they don't understand what is happening to their little bodies and that is the only thing that will calm them down.

"that" mom:  The mom who has her children's names tattooed on her wrist for the world to see,  their hospital footprints tattooed on her hip,  and a butterfly for each tattooed on her back.

I know that there are so many more definitions that I will think of after this post, but for right now, this is "that" mom that I am.

I embrace being "that" mom because I know that at any given moment, I am doing the best I can do by my children.  I am not always proud of the choices that I make as a mom, but even in those moments, I remember that I am just doing the best that I can, (and at that moment, the best isn't very good!!!)

Just curious (because I know way more people are reading this blog than I EVER thought would), what are some of your definitions to "that" mom?


  1. This post is so freaking good.

    The end.

    Oh, and one of your "that" moms (which, by the way, I related to all of those definitions except for the tats) is very much related to the post I'm about to write.

    It's kinda crazy how alike we are. I'm surprised we don't butt heads even more than we do. Love you.

  2. I loved this post! I'll add one:
    "that" mom: The mom who FB posts all of the things her kid can do, even though he's not even two years old yet. So many posts that one may think she is bragging, but really she's just incredibly proud!

  3. Right now I'm "that" mom that can't believe that her son's two-year birthday party is NEXT SUNDAY and I still haven't sent out invitations!

  4. You are so aware of who you are and I love that about you. One day I will have to come up with something like this but my list would look quite different cause this mom is not near as cool as you! :)

  5. I've learned to embrace being "that" Mom!