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Sunday, February 24, 2013

...because it is 46 degrees and the ground is covered in snow...

...we decided to build an iglooish crawl through...

Building


The brave one!


She made it!


Not sure what all the hype is about...he can calk through no problem!


Really scared my hips are not gonna fit!


Whew!!!  It didn't come crumbling down!


Not nearly as concerned as I was!


Although... he was worried about his shoulders!


Silliness!


And she made it!


Serious party pooper!!
So fun!!!

Friday, February 22, 2013

...fight or flight...

I have a very typically shy and calm 7 year old.  There is not a lot that gets her worked up except she readily admits that she does not know how to tease, and can't handle it.  She is very smart and knows and uses words that I don't think any 7 year old should know.  When we are alone together (without the 4 year old) it's almost like hanging out with your best friend.  It is quite possibly the most amazing thing, to "hang out" with your daughter.  (When paired with her sister, however, she is silly, loud, crazy, annoying...)

She is 48 pounds.  She has great manners.  She is kind.  She would not do anything to intentionally hurt anyone else's body or feelings.

Come at her with a throat swab though, and watch the heck out.  Because the 48 pounds of sweetness turns in to the Incredible Hulk.  And I am NOT exaggerating!!!

It all started earlier this week with a complaint of a sore throat.  But, there were no other symptoms and she has been acting fine.  This lasted 3 days.  Until yesterday, when her throat "really" hurt, but she had  just come in from playing in the snow, so if it hurt too bad, she wouldn't have been outside playing, right??  But, no.  Because when I went to kiss her, she was hot.  Like, really hot.  So I took her temperature.  102.  WHAT???  How did I not know?  How long had she had a fever?  I AM A HORRIBLE MOTHER!!!  WHY DIDN'T I LISTEN TO HER???

So, I immediately went to the medicine cabinet and found not one, not two, not three, but FOUR bottles of EXPIRED Tylenol and Ibuprofen.  And did I mention that the state was in a State of Emergency and no one is supposed to be on the roads unless it is an emergency?  Oh, and we live in the country and our roads are typically horrible...so, yeah.

So, I called my friend, asked what she would do, and proceeded to give my daughter alternating doses of expired medicine to bring her fever down, with a promise to call the pediatrician as soon as it opened in the morning.  (I did try to call the office, but they had shut down early due to weather and I did not think it was an emergency enough to call the exchange...)

We got in quickly and went through her vitals and the nurses brought out the swabs.  And that is when all hell broke loose.  My calm daughter turned in to a kicking, screaming, hitting maniac!  So much, that our pediatrician (who we LOVE and think the world of) came in...from the next room...to give my girl a little lecture on not hitting or kicking the nurses.  AWESOME!  And then, we proceeded to try again for the test.

It looked a little something like this...  I was sitting on the table, M was between my legs.  My legs were wrapped around hers, my arms were wrapped around hers.  The doctor was completely wrapped around me to hold Merrick's head still, while one nurse opened her mouth with that wooden thing so the other could swab the back of her throat.  It took four adults to get one throat swab from a 7 year old.  And it made me sweat.  Like, a lot.

She was freaking scared and I had to hold her tight afterwards while she cried and told me why she went crazy...she was afraid she would swallow the sticks.  I mean, think about it.  Someone coming at you with really long cotton swabs in your mouth and it feels like they are sticking them down your throat!  It scares me too.  But at least I know I won't swallow them.

My girls definitely has some fight in her.  Which I kind of like.  Because I know that if someone ever tries to hurt her, she will most assuredly give them a run for their money.

...


Tuesday, February 12, 2013

...sticks and stones...

I have a mama bear inside me.

If you know me, you know this.

Today, my mama bear showed up after picking Merrick up from after-care.  I think I can safely say that until today, all of my mama bear outrages have been adult-directed.  I mean, kids are kids and may not have the best role models, thus they may not always know better.  Adults and professionals are free game.  I mean, you do something that is not in the best interest of my child, and I will likely let you know.

But let me tell you...when your heart breaks because another child hurt your child's feelings SO BADLY...it's pretty tough to contain the bear.

Also, if you know me, you know that my soul is pretty sensitive.  And so is Merrick's.  So that old saying "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" does not apply to either one of us.  Punch me in the face, the pain goes away.  Stab me in the heart with your words or actions, the pain sticks around for much, much longer.

So, today... I walked in to the (Christian-based) child care to see M sitting on the bleachers by herself, looking a little somber.  She got up to get her stuff and I went to get T.  I met her outside of Taya's room and looking sad, I asked her what was wrong.  Bring on the tears!  So I picked her up and held her and let her cry until she could tell me what was wrong.  (note:  I would like to say that the story itself does not sound horrible, and possibly silly, but trust me when I say that you would understand if you were there!)  Her friends had all left early.  She didn't have anyone to play with.  She tried to go to the coloring table with the older girls, who proceeded to say that she "tooted" and covered their noses with their shirts. Merrick then said that she did not and tried to continue coloring while the girls continued to make her feel uncomfortable, to which she got up and left. This all doesn't sound out of the ordinary of typical girl stuff, right? So, I comforted her and we went out to the car. Where she continued to sob because her feelings were that hurt. Which was the turning point to the broken mama heart that released the bear. Because here's the thing... When your 7 year old is sobbing and says "If Camryn was there, she would have told them to stop. But I'm glad my friends weren't there, because then they didn't have to feel what I feel," something inside of you snaps!

OK you mean little twerps!!! Who are you to make my daughter feel uncomfortable and hurt her heart like that???

So, we got our of the car, marched inside, and told on them!!! ;). OK, well, really we walked in and I let Merrick tell the director what happened. She assured Merrick that being treated that way was not acceptable, and we talked through what to do next time. But here's the deal, kids or not, girls or not, they need to know that they cannot treat other people that way. It is not OK. And why are kids so freaking mean?

So, I guess my bear was somewhat in check, but the things I wanted to say and do, I didn't. Because I am Merrick's number one role model. And raising a respectful daughter is much more rewarding than the gratification that would be obtained from retaliation.

I know I can't always protect my children, and learning to cope in the real world is a life skill we have to learn...but damn, why does it have to be so hard???

Saturday, February 9, 2013

...gone, forever...

Put your Alice Cooper hats on...

Pull-ups gone at nighttime
Wet pads gone forever
Diapers blown to pieces

No more pull-ups
No more wet pads
No more mommy changing sheets

Out for nighttime
Out forever
We will never be going back

Pull-ups gone at nighttime
Wet pads gone forever
Diapers blown to pieces
Nighttime panties completely!!!!





Friday, February 8, 2013

...the ring...

...is missing.

My ringless hand
Next month marks our 9th wedding anniversary.  It also marks approximately 9 years that my husband has been without his wedding ring.  It's not that he is opposed to wearing it, but for work reasons, he only wore it when he went out.  And then he lost weight and the ring was too big.  So, I can't even tell you the last time I have seen him with his ring on.  It now has a permanent spot on my thumb.  Because someone should be wearing the platinum band, right?

To be completely honest, this has never really bothered me.  I don't think that Dave or I need a ring to serve as a reminder of the covenants that were made to each other.  What does sometimes bother me, however, is that I am sometimes self-conscious when we go out as a family and he isn't wearing a ring (might other people think that we are an unmarried couple?) especially since my ring doesn't scream wedding ring.  (When we were married, we went with a simple wide band with the diamond that was different than the band on my engagement ring.  Essentially, we traded one band in for another, and there is not a "wedding band" that accompanies like most other ladies out there have.)

Over the years, we have actually contemplated getting rings tattooed on, but ultimately have decided against that.  So I just keep ignoring the fact that he appears to be "single" to the general population.  But, sometimes, that is tough too.  It's not just about us going out together and appearing to be an unmarried couple...but, ahem, I would say my husband is more attractive than the "average Joe" and I may perhaps have a jealous streak.  Therefore, sometimes when he is not with me, I really wish that he wouldn't be ringless.

So, with our 10 year anniversary coming up in just over a year, I have again started hinting that I would like to have an anniversary band.  But, I also want to go on a trip.  Decisions, decisions!!

Last night Dave mentioned that he was going to go into the city and would be by the Shane Co and asked if I wanted to have my ring cleaned and buffed.  (UHHH, YEAH!  I swear I haven't had that done in 7 years!!)  I told him that he should also take his in to be cleaned.

And then, later last night, we got in a tiff.  :(

So, this morning, I proceeded to leave him a note that said I was sorry for being a "b" and I hoped he had a great day.  Oh, and, although I love wearing his ring, if he would like to have it sized so that he could pretend to be married, that would be cool with me.  :)

Later today he texted to tell me that I had gotten paid an extra stipend on my paycheck, and I jokingly told him to take the $190 and buy himself a cheap wedding ring.

But the coolest thing happened... HE DID!  And not just a ring that he wears when we go out, but a ring that he can wear all of the time.  Which makes me so happy.

AND THEN... he sent me a picture of my ring, with a diamond band attached.  WHAT??  It's only our 9th anniversary!  

So, I am super excited to say that I too am ringless...but only until Sunday, when I get my "refurbished" (cleaned and buffed) ring back that is sautered to my new diamond band.  And the next time you see us out together in public, there should be no question whether we are married or not!! (oh, and I guess there's that thing about him not appearing to be single either!)

...



Tuesday, February 5, 2013

...confessions of a 37 year old mom...

...the truth is, sometimes I feel like my kids got a bad draw when it came to getting me as a mom.

...the truth is, sometimes I think my kids are pretty damn lucky that they got me as a mom.

...the truth is that I believe with all my heart that being a mom and wife is absolutely the hardest thing in the world.

...the truth is, I suck at routines. And my kids suffer because of it.

...the truth is, my car is such a horrible and disgusting mess that merely getting in it takes my mood down a notch or two every day.

...the truth is, I long to be a neat freak and often wonder if I can somehow get that gene implanted.

...the truth is, for 4 or so days out of the month I feel like I have no control over my emotions or temper and I hate it.

...the truth is that I worry on a daily basis that something will happen to one of my girls or Dave.

...the truth is that I worry on a daily basis that something will happen to me and my kids will grow up without a mother, or with a mother that could never love them like I do.

...the truth is, I never feel good enough.

...the truth is, I often wonder if I have taken the correct professional road in my life.

...the truth is, I know I could be a better wife, friend, and mom, but sometimes it just seems exhausting.

...the truth is, I have got it pretty good compared to others...and I need to let things go...


 
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